I’ve just got back from the world series of comedy, in Las Vegas and, wait for it, it was won by….a Canadian. Well, he lives in Atlanta, GA, but come on, the “world” title can be more or less justified now. I crashed and burned in the wild card round for the second year running. Five minutes is tough, enough time to hang yourself, but maybe not enough time to get yourself out of the noose.
I spent the afternoon in my hotel room, cutting, slicing, hoping to avoid the indignity of being played off the stage as I was in 2011. 2010, by the way, I triumphed to the later rounds, so I know how that feels as well – weird. Why? Because, if comedy isn’t tough enough, now you have lost the comradeship of all the other comics. I went backstage to celebrate, but found it bare, other than a few empty water bottles and discarded sets so I took my grinning self to the desolate bar, bereft of happiness, where I was met with a begrudging “suppose they need a Brit in the competition” from the first comic I met. David Tobey, the resident MC at the WSOC, always says pre-show “comedy” and “competition” are two words that shouldn’t be together, this is an art form, try not to get too caught up in it all. I think he’s right. Having been on both sides, I kind of wish it was more of a festival and less of a competition and to be fair that is what seems to be the attitude of the organizers. Joe Lowers does a great job, getting together 101 terrific comics and putting on seminars throughout the week, from bookers, headliners, to my own comedy Guru, Jerry Corley. I had to leave on the Thursday after we’d all had a game of bowling, punctuated by one wheelchair bound comic driving across the lanes.
Since then I have done 3 gigs. I tell a lie, I was booked for two, and ended up doing one. No Dave, your maths is off. Ok, let me explain. Ice House – Pasadena, great venue, great comics, great night. Next night, I went to the Improv to actually watch a show, which was kind of weird, as my instinct was to go backstage, pace around and keep running to the loo as I always do when I’m in a comedy club waiting to hit the stage. Anyway, one of the comics kindly offered me a spot at Flappers the next night. Great. I never knowingly turn down stage time, so off I went to play the main room in front of….oh, no-one turned up. So not for the first time in my career, show cancelled. Rather than waste the drive, I thought why not pop my head round the corner to the Yoo Hoo room only to find a bear on stage re-counting, you guessed it, bear humour. Well, it’s a choice. And not one to be taken lightly as the bear came off stage I had to help the poor fella out of his sweat filled costume. David Neiker, then said to me “stick around” I’m putting you up. Great, I’ll pace around and go to the loo 500 times – good to be back in familiar territory. At comedy clubs, we have a light, I used to hate it, but I now kind of like it – it signals the last minute, or 2 minutes of your set and when necessary, get the hell off the stage. And so the light went on the next comic, who it has to be said was not going down particularly well…and then the light flashed: time up. Again. And Again. And…I’m sorry Dave, I’m going to have to bump you. So like a grizzly bear after a meat-less night I slowly meandered back to my cave away from the bright light of the comedy club that one comic never saw.
Go on, give it a listen…
So what else does a comedian need in his bag of tricks? Jokes? Stop heckling me in my head. No, a podcast. You knew that was coming right? Of course you did, everyone has one these days. Well now, so do I. I’ve teamed up with funny lady, Kacey Arnold, as we discuss in a rip roaringly hysterical way, the important things in life, well mainly us really, hence the title “Narcissistic News”. Richard Gardner told me I had to do this, so out of spite I made him produce it. Ha. That’ll teach him to come up with ideas!
This week we discuss the things in life that really concern us, like mosquito’s and an obese woman who has decided the only way to lose weight is by having sex with her ex husband. Her Ex!?! What a weird and wonderful world we live in – makes my job a lot easier.
Hope you enjoy it, let me know what you think. Tweet me: David_Conolly.